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Rachel here...who am i? Hmmm...that's a question i never really know how to answer.
All i can say is i'm a child of God journeying through this road called life with my finest blessings - my family, friends and folks i bump into along the way.
Who i am don't matter. What does matter is that we connect and encourage each other along our different paths that lead to the same destination -
Our Father face to face!
So ewe (pronounced 'You' meaning lamb; the meaning of my name) see....it's about the little (n big) things in life that connect us to one another (unity in diversity) and bring us closer to God.
Ephesians 4:4-7
"We are all one body, we have the same Spirit, and we have all been called to the same glorious future.
There is only one Lord, one faith, one baptism,
and there is only one God and Father, who is over us all."
Make yourself at home, voice your thoughts...i'd love to hear from you!
Love n peace out!
1:34 PM
Monday, September 29, 2008
Sea of Faces...
When i was feeling low a couple of days ago, i was so touched by so many friends' support and nudges to move forward. I'm truly blessed. Thank you guys...right back at ewe...Always be here for you and more importantly God's always there for you.
Then i got to thinking about how many poeple there may be that...don't share how they feel...and don't get the encouragement they deserve.
If you're someone today or tomorrow or anyday reading this...here's a video i found online. May it's truth encourage and enable you.
These couple of days have been just those kinda days when i'm struggling with who i am and the significance of my existence. Maybe it's because i've been unwell these past few days that have left me unable to do much so my mind is whirling into unknown recesses. Or maybe it's time to take a reality check; to be aware of that silver lining between things that are temporal and eternal. I don't know. But i didn't cry in the wake of my struggles...i've resolutely decided that i'm stronger than that, the day will pass and the phase will end. So instead i distracted my mind on the net. First i found some poetry to articulate my pensive mood. The Pains of Sleep by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, was a perfect articulation. But it was little help.
Then for some reason, began looking at old blog entries from some of you, my friends. Came to Cheryl's blog. I enjoy reading her blogs. Apart from being a good friend, she's a good writer - charismatic vulnerable,resolute and comical at the right moments. Well, was really just looking through, numb to my surroundings including a list of to-dos, when i came across an entry of hers posted last year April.
Last April, i was so privileged and blessed to be a part of her church's Easter production. Did new things, learnt new things. But in all the newness, it was also a time which caught me struggling with my mediocrity and insignificance. I always wondered, 'God, i did that play 'cos i love you and wanna do what i can do to point people to you. And you opened the door. But really any role i played that day...did it amount to anything at all?'
I found out the answer today. More than a year later, in a different setting but the same musings. Cheryl's entry (thank you Cheryl for sharing) wrote that two souls were saved, many more souls were seeded and God touched her with a glimpse of His love and compassion for us. So here now my tear drops are unlocked...not because i'm feeling insignificant anymore. But because God's great unfailing love and compassion has touched me. Reminding and assuring me that i am the pot and He is the potter. The potter may use us in normal insignificant circumstances...but who are we, the pots, to say to our Creator that we're insignificant. Our job is not to question Him, it's to trust Him.
Thank You so much, my Father. To say I love You now is an understatement.
God continue to bless and use you my friends...and may this song of the season help you to keep trusting Him...
It all began two Tuesdays ago. My day at work was just perfect and i was all ready to get to music appreciation class. It had been kinda cloudy for a couple of hours but it hadn't rained so although i hadn't a umbrella, i thought i'd be able to make it to the bus interchange. The moment i got to the traffic lights...the rain decided to skip a drizzle and it poured! I ran under a couple of nearby blocks, slightly wet but alright. But when i stepped into the interchange, i saw my bus pulling away...i was left behind! I knew i'd be super late for class if i waited for the next bus so i thought, 'what the hey, i'll grab a cab today'. I was soooo glad that there wasn't a queue at the cab stand but instead a queue of waiting cabs. Then i realised that i didn't have any cash with me, only NETS (whew...at least i figured this now before taking a cab). But guess what? Every cab in line weren't Nets enabled! After waiting for 5 mins, i decided to walk over to a ATM located at the other end of the mall (by this time, i was half goin mad and contemplating if i should just go back home). Got the cash, walked back to the cab stand...to find that a long queue had formed! Aarrrg! Breathe in breathe out...nevermind stood in line and eventually got a cab with a real street-smart cabbie that drove me to school in record time!
The following days had me running out of cash, being very stressed and...my computer crashed!!! It was really bad timing...i had just ended working full-time and had all the time to really get down to some work, research some stuff on the net, keep in touch with folks through e-mail and blog whatever great ideas were coming to mind. I lost it. I couldn't even pray but just lashed out with such frustration 'God, my laptop has to come back, let it be restored...i don't have the energy and money to fix this...' I don't know if God heard my prayer but i'm sure He heard my mum's. Because when i pressed the switch for what i told myself will be the final time, the screen came alive and went through a recovery process. In the end, i had my laptop in factory condition but had lost all my documents, assignments, pictures, videos etc. All gone!!! Anyway, i let my laptop rest for a few days. Last Friday, i picked it back up confidently and switched it on to find...that it wouldn't!!! I tried and tried and tried to discover that it was the adapter's fault! I eventually got the adapter today and here i am!
The days i've been disabled without my laptop and as i got this laptop going again, i've been reflecting on this series of events...and realised with such clarity that these events weren't unfortunate. They were daily living, trivial things that happen once in a while even to the most prepared of us. These things didn't stop life, or the world from revolving. What was unfortunate was my attitude. I had become so comfortable in the breezy easy life of shelters, IRIS (realtime bus schedule), nets enabled cabs, a laptop, internet connection, electricity...and all the accesibilities that Singapore has. I took these for granted and when little disturbed, turned into a melodramatic complain queen!
Where was God in all this? He was with me...but I had chosen not to look at Him. I'm reminded of a line in "The Irish Blessing"...count your blessings instead of your crosses. In other words, i had looked at all the things gone wrong and ignored the common grace God had bestowed upon me plus all the extra help He was giving me. So ewe see...I'm going to be thankful now by remembering all the good of the last two weeks (well at least the snippets i can recall)...
1) the street-smart cabbie
2) getting to class on time and having great mates that relieved the day's events with humour
3) having a challenging and fascinating class
4) though it was pouring all day on Wed, on my way to class in the evenin it became only a slight drizzle that didn't need me holding an umbrella...yet a kind genleman offered to share his at a traffic light...modern day chivalry :)
5) Friday was my last day of work and i was so touched cos' the folks i worked with gave me such a kind, warm and fun farewell lunch. Oh and they taught me how to like really bowl (and not just drop the ball!!!)...and their gift of a pearl pendant is something so beautiful that i'll treasure!
6) Having a blast of a rehearsal at sch!
7) Seeing my polymate Sandy being a happy bride and attending the wedding dinner on Sun night with my best pals who never fail to make me laugh...Munirah & Yasmin!
8) Having a fun and memorable performance thingy at school on Mon!
9) Having the chance to catch up on some precious sleep because i wasn't working anymore.
10) Having a temp job i really enjoy!
11) Receiving a really cute teddy bear as a gift :)
12) My sis's b-day: i can't (and don't wanna) imagine my life without my two sisters...i'd be a boring wreck!
13) My computer being restored...it's alright i lost stuff ,at least none of them were irreplacable or works in progress! Phew!
14) Having a mum who bears with it when i turn into a complain queen...and my dad for lending the cash to purchase a new adapter
15) Being right here right now...etc
See! How much great stuff can be overshadowed by trivial discomforts :s Thank you Jesus for opening my eyes...Thank You, thank You, thank You that everything's better than alright =D
Next time something goes wrong, may this song of the season remind you to "count your blessings instead of your crosses"...
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Rachel Eric, 2008.
Each of us should live a life stirring enough to start a movement...We should love unquenchably,dream unfalteringly, and work unceasingly.
- Max Lucado, On The Anvil